And a very good morning to you my lovely readers. I'm full of the joys of summer. Were you up early enough to see the beautiful sunrise this morning? Isn't it just the best free show on earth? I went to bed early and got up early. Made a coffee, and watched it rise behind the trees at the bottom of my garden. Not my trees, the silver birches are in the garden behind mine. A panoramic view from my upstairs window.
Stunning, love the whispy reds. It's looking like another blue sky day today. Yesterday I started my walks again, the leg is better, then another afternoon in the summer house. Could be the same pattern for today. Best make the most of the nice weather.
I hope you have a lovely Sunday, with your mum, your kids and grandkids if you have any. My mum would have been 99, sadly she died 35 years ago. Love you mum.
Thanks for popping in, we'll catch up soon. Toodle pip
Hello. Sunday morning and it's sunny, what could be better. The whole day ahead of me, brilliant.
Something I need to get off my chesticles. Oh no, not that chuffin Troll again, yep, but this is something I have to explain. Many people have said I should ignore and delete the comments, and if I publish, it only feeds them. Troll will be jumping up and down with glee knowing they have got the publicity they crave and knowing they have got to me. Well I don't see it that way.
I don't give a toss about the feelings of the Troll, the only person I care about is me. Self preservation is the name of the game. It isn't about a battle between them and me, it's about me feeling good about myself. Bottling something up inside is a form of self destruction, letting it all go is opening the pressure valve and that's what I did. I don't spend a lot of time feeling sorry for myself because why should I? I have a great life and no one can take that away from me. My life is what I have built for myself, and always will be.
Something festering needs to be released. I was getting annoyed by this person who came back time and time again to bully me. I tried the recommended approach, ignore and delete. Yes, that works for a while, and for anyone who has not been bullied in this way, that's easy to say, and not so easy to carry out. Systematic bullying does wear you down even a strong person like me will feel despair at times. Yes, I am resilient, I can bounce back, but there comes a point that whatever you are doing to cope is not working.
I got to that stage, and that's why I had to fight back. As I said, bottling something up, something that is bothering you, putting on a brave face, can lead to all kinds of mental issues. Something has to give. I am a person who needs to be up front, honest, and not afraid to show my true feelings, that's why I am writing as I am now. Secrets fester, putting on a show is false, being something I am not is false. It's the old cliche with me, what you see is what you get.
The Troll is opposite to me. Someone who who is secretly bullying someone under the name Anonymous, has issues, there is something not quite right in their life. I would say to this person, or any bully, get a life. Look inside yourself, do you like yourself, why are you so nasty? Get yourself sorted out, and if you don't there will be Karma, you will one day find yourself in a place you don't want to be.
So, I did what I did for me, I needed to let go of the of the build up which was beginning to take place in my head, and how I do that is by speaking out. I thank you all for your support and advice, I take it all on board, but ultimately it's down to me how best to deal with it. I take full responsibility for my actions.
There have been a couple of 'Sorry, goodbye', comments, which may or may not have been from Anon Troll. To be honest, I don't care if they are sorry or not, it's they who have to live with themselves. My exposing them wasn't about revenge, it was about me being honest, me releasing the pressure, and me doing the best for myself.
The matter rests for now, I have a life to live.
Thanks for popping in. Get yourself outside, keep walking, enjoy where you live. We'll catch up soon. Toodle pip.
Hello. I will never understand how people can be horrible to each other, why they feel the need to bully another human being. Is this a behaviour which is learnt, or are people born bullies? My memory doesn't go back to the beginning of my life, but I can't remember me ever bullying anyone. Indeed I was bullied at school, mainly name calling with reference to my appearance, but that's what kids did then and still do now.
What is the point of bullying exactly? Possibly to exert some kind of authority over someone the bully feels is inferior to them, it massages their ego to gain the upper hand. Possibly the bully feels threatened and needs to lash out to re enforce their own feelings of inferiority, again to 'big' themselves up. Or maybe they have a nasty trait in their personality.
Over the last five years or so, Troll has made it her mission to put me down, to criticize, to belittle me, and to ridicule my blog. The comments come in thick and fast, nearly always anonymous, sometimes with made up names, but always from the same area of the UK. I have a tracker on here. Sometimes they go quiet for a while, the Troll tells me they won't be reading any more. But the temptation is too great and they reappear after a gap of a few months. A little bit like OCD, Troll just cannot help themselves.
I call this person Troll, but in reality it is not trolling, it is bullying. This Troll has admitted that we have met face to face. A real Troll randomly posts nasty comments to everyone and everybody, this Troll is bullying me and it's personal.
Although the comments are aimed at putting me down, at undermining my confidence, after this length of time and the fact that I am still here, you can probably tell it's not working. The comments say more about the Troll than they do about me. I publish a few of them here for your perusal. Some of them are a lot worse than this, they get deleted, but I have saved a few of them so you can look into the mind of a bully. My comments in bold follow each one.
I don’t understand why you have cider and pretend it’s wine. Why not just have wine? Why pretend? Silly giggly video. Sipping it ‘like a lady’ doesn’t cut it for you, not when you’ve already demonstrated eating your meal out of a pan! Definitely not ladylike AT ALL! Not to mention the unmentionables, they’re certainly not ladylike!!!! onSave money on your alcohol. Troll has no sense of humour. Personal comments about my appearance often crop up.
Posh speaking tone? Do you need a hearing aid my dear? There is nothing posh about mispronouncing the English language. As in ‘everythinK’ onSoup of the day.
in response to Ilona, I just had to watch your soup-making video, and thanks, you really made me smile! I agree that a home-made soup is the very best, though I sometimes throw in a small, diluted tin of chicken noodle soup into one of my concoctions just to make a bigger potful. Anyway, quite enjoyed your posh and clear speaking tone
I expect the Troll is meticulous about using the English language correctly, both written and speech.
I agree, how rude. So disrespectful to call them Charlie and Cami, perhaps she thinks that’s funny. But what else can you expect from someone who doesn’t have a grasp of the Queen’s English, put everythinK in the soup. onSoup of the day. A second criticism of how I speak, in the same post.
Not sure you got your money’s worth there. £10 is an awful lot to pay for a bit of hard skin removing and a blob of moisturiser! onHugo says.....
Another attempt to belittle me.
You certainly need a tripod. Two minutes of a shaky sink left me feeling quite nauseated. Your housework chores must take an awfully long time, it took you 3 minutes to wash one tiny patch of floor!!! onGetting close up to the job I expect the Troll's household chores to be nothing less than perfectly timed. Critical of my fun post, again, no sense of humour.
It’s none of your business whether someone gets paid for walking a dog. Tittle tattle of someone with nothing better to occupy their mind. onFan of Heartbeat Is Troll still working and is a little jealous that I can do exactly what I want with my time?
Hmmm, I do recall you yourself do put the occasional swear word on your blog, perhaps it’s marked by *** for some of the letters but the meaning is the same. onMind your language Troll has really dug deep to discover this snippet of detail from a blog post long past. Very OCD
Bugsy needs to be warm? Shame that you didn’t think that for poor arthritic Rocky. onBills Bills Bills Very below the belt. How low can Troll stoop? Very nasty streak.
Chocolate Santas? Ha ha thought that would make you think. Write a post one day saying you don’t indulge in junk food then expose all on your receipt. You’re sure to say you bought them for someone else now, but we’re not all so gullible. Did you NEED all that veg? There were others who would have liked more. onSlashing the grocery bill More scrutiny of past blog posts. The Chocolate Santa's were in a small packet costing 25p, five of them, half the size of my little finger. Regarding all that veg, yes I did need it, and ate it, and there was plenty for others to take. Troll being nasty again.
I don’t usually comment but find a contradiction here! Ha ha! You don’t want food that’s full of sugar and is junk? What’s cake then? Not to mention Chocolate Santas? CHOCOLATE SANTAS! Go on then tell us they’re for someone else, we’ll believe you! onSlashing the grocery bill Don't kid me Troll, don't usually comment, ha ha. Three comments on the Chocolate Santa's.
You could always sell trumpets. onLife is good on a pension This is reference to blowing my own trumpet, which she has often accused me of in the past.
What’s the big deal? Ok so you don’t like Christmas or socialising. Neither do I but I don’t make a big deal or fuss about it. Choose to stay home? Then stay home! Who cares? One thing for sure – you’re not likely to get invited next year so you won’t have the choice to make! One difference between you and me - I don’t feel the need to pontificate and repeatedly say ‘I am’ and big myself up. I don’t have an ego the size of a house either! onOnly available from a supermarket Troll, there is a big difference between you and me. I don't continually go onto someone else's blog and pull them to pieces. That's a laugh, ego the size of a house. I have never touted for more readers, more followers, and never entered for any blog awards. Don't need to increase my page views, because there is no financial gain for me to do so.
And the reason for this post is........if you are being bullied, get yourself a set of balls. The bully has the problems not you. Be thankful that you are not walking in their shoes, that your brain functions normally and your mind is not warped. Surround yourself with nice people and let the bullies fester in their own swamp.
I'm going to enjoy the rest of the day, looks good enough outside to go a walk. Thanks for popping in, we'll catch up soon. Toodle pip
Hello. It is still raining and I am not getting much walking done. Never mind, I will catch up eventually, in the meantime I am hooked on painting, pictures that is, not walls. An email came in a few days ago which asks a question, and as it is a good topic for a blog post I thought I would answer it here, with the writers permission. Hi Ilona, My name is Sam and I am a young lad from Spain. I just felt the need to write you a "keep up the good work" email, since I have been reading your blog for a while now and find you and your lifestyle truly inspiring. Thanks for showing me that you do not need to conform to a traditional lifestyle and that going against the current is perfectly fine. I have only recently started accepting that being very careful with spending is not a bad thing. I was so terrified of coming across as tight. Now I jokingly call myself tight. For me, it's all about trading things for experiences. I want my life to be full of experiences and not just things. Deep down, I have known for years that, for me, being rich is doing meaningful work. I still have a long road ahead, I struggle every day with family and society's expectations. Not craving people's approval is not something they teach you at school or work. What about you, did you ever struggle with your life choices being frowned upon? Any advice on how to cope with it? Regards Hi Sam, Thanks a lot for your kind words. I am chuffed that my blog is being read by all ages, and is helpful to you. I love this phrase you use, 'going against the current is perfectly fine'. That's exactly how I feel. Although there has been periods in my life where I felt I had to fit in and be one of the crowd, I am now in a better place having broken away from mainstream expectations. It is a liberating feeling knowing I can be myself, and take full responsibility for my own well being and happiness. I no longer need approval from others to make me feel good. It is natural for younger people to want to fit in. Being an outcast when you are young is no fun at all, such is the cruel way that people bully each other. It takes a very brave young person who hasn't been around very long to stand up and say, this is me, this is who I am. I followed the normal pattern of a young girl with no qualifications leaving school in 1964, and worked in shops, offices, and factories, in female type jobs because that was expected. Now of course things are different, there is no such thing as jobs for women, and jobs for men, or shouldn't be, as discriminating on the grounds of gender is illegal. There is so much pressure these days on keeping up appearances. Everywhere you look there are influences to spend more money. Credit cards, overdrafts and loans to encourage you to spend more. People walking around with a £500 phone stuck to the side of their head, kids who have rich parents, cruising the streets in the flashiest car they can find, young people hooked into the celebrity culture, all of which will ultimately be their downfall as they become bored or the debts wrack up. A young person who can stand up and say no thanks to all this, should be applauded, not picked on. Ultimately I think it is the parents responsibility to teach their children good money management, but as we know, a lot of parents don't have the skills in the first place. It's not like it was years ago when I was a child, my mum managed on very little money, and I learnt from her. I wasn't too happy about the names I have been called in the past by the press, skinflint, tight, miserly, among others. Stingy was particularly hurtful. But now I wear my badge with pride, people can say what they like, I know I am the winner. I have no need to fit in. You ask, 'Did you ever struggle with your life choices being frowned upon?' Yes it was a struggle sometimes, but I have never shied away from questioning myself, and my identity. I often search my feelings deep down in my heart and my mind, even now, it never stops. The way to all learning is to first look inside yourself. All through my life I have questioned my identity, if there was something I didn't understand I would look for the answers. First within myself, and also with the help of books, magazines, and now the internet. There are such a lot of resources available. Yes, I know I harp on about this, but it can't be ignored. I felt I was struggling against a tidal wave when I started lorry driving in 1976. So much negativity came my way, I felt like giving up many times. But I stuck with it, the more people said I shouldn't be doing it because it was taking the job off a man, the more determined I became to carry on. I seem to have been blessed with an inner strength. After being bullied at school and made to feel ugly and hopeless, then struggling through my teenage years wanting to fit in with the gang, at the age of 27 I finally found something that I was passionate about, and my inner strength was there to help me. You ask for my advice on how to cope with your struggles. Sam, life is a journey, the road you choose is up to you. There will be times when you wonder what it's about. What you should never lose sight of is that you have been blessed with a life, it is a gift, and you have a duty to yourself to make it the best you can. There will be outside influences pulling you in one direction or another. Think things through carefully and make your decision, do you turn left, or do you turn right? One is a dead end, the other is the way forward. Don't worry if you are going in the wrong direction, we all lose our way at one time or another, just turn round and take a different route. I often talk about taking responsibility for oneself. What I never do is blame anyone else for the the position I find myself in. My life has been planned by me, I take full responsibility. I have the power to change things if they are not right. I have learnt to rise above any negativity that comes my way, sweep it to one side and ignore. Practice is what you need, Sam, things will get easier with age and experience. I think I have covered everything, I hope it has been useful to you. Live your life Sam, in the way that you want to, not in the way that someone thinks you ought to. Best of luck. We'll catch up soon. Enjoy your Sunday if you can, it's still raining here. Toodle pip
Hello. I've been entertaining myself with my old diaries, I have to chuckle about some of the things I got up to. I was quite a little flirt in my youth, made a beeline for any good looking eye candy that took my fancy. Here are some extracts that made me titter. This romance was quite short lived, about three weeks I think.
David rang at 1.15pm, then he came round and we went to the pub for a couple of pints till 4pm, then back to my place for coffee and a chat. He is lovely. I would like to see more of him but I don't know what he thinks about me. I think he likes me. Phone call from David, he asked if I was going to The Swan tonight, and if I wanted to go for a drink at the club on Sunday. I met him at the club then we came back to my place for a coffee. He is lovely, I was sad when he went home. I am feeling fed up today, it's hard to find any enthusiasm, why am I like this. I want to talk to David. I tried his number but he is not there. David called round in the afternoon. I had made a music tape for him, it was nice to see him. I was fed up so I went to the pub at 6.15pm. I was only going to have one drink, but I got chatting and had three pints, it was too much. I rang David at gone midnight, he was not very pleased. He said I am nuts. I must apologize to David. Felt lousy this morning, lay on the settee waiting to feel better. I am not going to drink that scrumpy cider again. David came round, we had a chat. I rang David and he said, come on over, so I did. We stayed in all afternoon watching videos. It's driving me nuts, so near yet so far away. I am going to have to try and cool it because he will get fed up with me. Why is he on my mind every minute of every day. He makes me happy, and I am sad. David came at 5.45pm, I cooked us dinner, then we went for a drink. He went at 10.30pm. I tried to get him to stay but he wouldn't. He said he would ring tomorrow. Davis hasn't rung, I don't know if he wants to go out with me tomorrow. David called round for an hour this afternoon, had a chat. I think I am over him now, he is probably not the one for me. Now I know David is not for me, thank goodness I am free.
Oh the heartache I went through when I was younger, did you go through it? I fell hook line and sinker, often jumping in with both feet. Things have changed a lot since then. Now that is all behind me, and I am grateful that I don't have to bother with trying to snare a boyfriend any more. It is such a relief, I couldn't cope with all that drama in my life now. That love thing can be very very complicated, and my simple life is going to stay that way. If I knew then what I know now, it would have saved a lot of heartache.
Thanks for popping in, we'll catch up soon. Toodle pip
Hello. It's chuffin cold outside, freezing cold in fact. I went out to do my walk and came straight back in to change into a thicker, heavier jacket with a hood. Three miles and one hour later and I was back. It would have been 50 minutes later, but I stopped to talk to Ken and Jade dog. She was a bit mucky on her back, I expect she is happy now that she can roll about and run free in the fields.
This was last night's dinner, and I had exactly the same for today's lunch. Piping hot Quorn and vegetable mild curry, very tasty. Another portion left for dinner later. The fridge is bare, not much left in the freezer, and only a few tins and packets. I have to go to town tomorrow so I will pick up some more supplies while I am there.
Have you noticed that this time of the year is like being in a void. The space between New Year and Easter is a bit of a no mans land. It's all a bit dead and flat. I feel like something ought to be happening, but not sure what. I keep busy, but it's getting a bit samey. I need a project.
It seems I am mentioned in a newspaper article in The Times today, about frugal living. I can just about make out the text on my Twitter feed, it's a mishmash of what's already been in print in various other newspapers. I don't tweet very much, mainly follow people I am interested in. Mainly people I have met, or who I would like to meet.
I was just thinking the other day, that I have never been on a protest march. I can't think of a cause that I feel so strongly about that would tempt me to join in. I have never liked being in a big crowd of people, and have only been to a couple of big star concerts. Cher at Sheffield was good, and Meatloaf at Birmingham was good.
Thinking back to how I was treated as a lorry driver in the 70's and 80's, I felt the best way I would survive was to knuckle down and quietly get on with my job. I always felt I was equal to men, I just happened to be in a different body. Times were tough, the men didn't want me there, but I stuck it out because I felt no matter what I looked like, I was equal to them.
People often asked me what it was like to do a mans job. My answer was always the same, it isn't a mans job, it's anybodies job. Other drivers would ask me, what does your husband think of you driving a lorry? My reply, what does your wife think of you driving a lorry? Years later they eventually got it, and the questions stopped.
Life is unfair for everyone at one time or another. I remember going to London to appear on a chat show on TV. It was a live discussion on a new course offered by Shell, the oil people, to train women to drive trucks and get their licence. I felt this was positive discrimination and unfair. If they were offering free courses for women, they should offer the same amount of free courses to men. In my eyes, equality works both ways.
Anyway, I'd better wrap this up. I need to get off this computer and do something else.
Thanks for popping in, we'll catch up soon. Toodle pip
Hello. Isn't it sad that people of supposedly higher than average intelligence feel the need to use foul language when they feel strongly about something. Anger rears it's ugly head in many aspects of our lives these days. The media, including magazines, newspapers, TV, and internet, are all becoming littered with offensive, filthy mouthed swearing. What does this say about the person spewing these profanities? The message I am getting is that it reveals a lack of self control, a lack of anger management, and an inability to express oneself eloquently due to a limited vocabulary.
Keyboard warriors are the worst culprits. It's so easy to punch a few keys on a keyboard before putting your brain into gear, with no thought of how your words might be perceived by the millions out there reading it. Anger mixed with foul language is a toxic combination and belongs in a sewer.
I don't suppose the millions of trolls out there give a stuff about how many people they offend, they see swearing as cool, makes them feel big, gives them a buzz. Anonymous trolls hide behind their anonymity, they haven't the guts to put their names to the bile they spew. They are to be pitied.
Then there are the people who you wouldn't expect to be swearing, those that do put their names to their words. It comes as a bit of a surprise that those well known faces should compromise their position by allowing their anger to bubble up to such a degree that they are no longer in control of their fingers darting across the keyboard.
Mind you, woe betide anyone who dares to challenge the use of foul language, for on social media they can easily be deleted. Warning, when you challenge an angry person who is spewing offensive language, your comment will be dumped. Maybe not immediately, but go back at a later time and it will be gone.
Don't mess with an angry person, it's not worth the hassle. Ignore. Being angry makes them feel good. Leave the anger with them, it's their anger, not yours. Do not take any part of it. Keep calm, move on.
Thanks for popping in, we'll catch up soon. Toodle pip
PS. Please don't swear in your comments. Thank you.
Hello. I watched the first episode of Tina and Bobby on itv catch up last night, and was hoping for something similar to the Cilla story set in the 1960's. Sheridan Smith played a very credible Cilla Black, she seems to be able to turn her acting skills into any character she takes on.
Michelle Keegan plays Tina, wife of Bobby Moore, Lorne MacFadyen plays Bobby. I must say, I was a bit disappointed. Michelle left her role of Tina McIntyre in Coronation Street a while back to explore different roles and establish herself as a versatile actress. I didn't see the drama set in the army in which she played a squadie, 'Our Girl', I think it was called. Re inventing yourself each time you take on a different role must take quite a lot of effort, some can do it, but sometimes a little bit of the previous character is always there in the background.
I was hoping to see a brand new Michelle Keegan, giving it her all, and taking on a whole new personality. In the first episode I saw Tina Coronation Street, playing Tina the Footballers Wife. The script wasn't particularly enthralling either, the scenes were too short to encompass deep emotions, not allowing the actors to showcase their full potential. The producers/directors were in too much of a hurry to fit everything into the first episode. It didn't have me on the edge of my seat, and I am not chomping at the bit to see what comes next. I will watch, but only to see if the acting improves.
Anyway, that's bye the bye. It got me thinking about the different roles we all find ourselves in throughout our lives. When you think about it, we have to adapt to our circumstances, we have to keep up with whatever changes present themselves to us. Ok, so we don't have to switch from one character to another like actors do, there are longer periods of time in between our different roles. Quite often our roles do overlap, and for those expert multi taskers it shouldn't be too much of a problem when with practice they can jiggle two or three roles at the same time.
For years I defined myself as being a lorry driver, a woman working in a male dominated environment, I adapted to that role. Now that is in the past, I have a new role which I have created for myself. Yes, I harp back sometimes, the memories never go away, but we are all acting on a big stage or on a film set. We all have a role to play in the grand scheme of things. Finding the right pace on how fast we move on in life is all down to us as individual actors.
Michelle must have asked herself at some point if she wants a fairly secure job for life, by staying in Coronation Street, in the same way that say, a person working at the steelworks might want to work in the same place until retirement. Michelle chose to make changes and take a different direction, to explore new opportunities.
I was happy to stay in transport because of the variety, I had to adapt very quickly to driving all types of vehicles and deliver all kinds of loads, and work for lots of different companies. It gave me a buzz. Then the buzz died and I moved on.
Right some questions for you. Are you where you want to be, honestly? Can you see yourself doing something else? Will you be able to adapt? Will you be taking on new roles? Or would you like to stay where you are? There might be another role for me yet, something else might come my way. That's the exciting part of life, it evolves, new situations, never know what's around the corner.
I'll leave you with that thought. Bugsy has eaten overnight, and this morning. He seems a bit better. I have a WI frugal talk to do tonight, need to get my props ready for that.
Thanks for popping in, we'll catch up soon. Toodle pip
Hello. Does anyone remember this book, for a while it was my bible, I studied it often, trying to absorb as much information as I could. It came out in 1982, I had been trucking for six years and I did have it all.
Love, success, sex, yes, but money, not so sure. Yes, I had enough money, but not loads of it. I had enough to get on the housing ladder, but it was a struggle in the beginning when every penny I had went into the house. I thought I was the bees knees, the dream job, own house and car, plenty of opportunity to meet boyfriends, oh yes, life was good.
It was quite early on that I realized that there was a difference between what I needed and what I wanted. I needed to have a roof over my head, but it didn't need to be modern and fashionable. I needed a car to get to work, but it didn't need to be flashy or new, anything with four wheels and an engine was ok. I needed clothes, some of them were new, but I made them last a long time, I didn't need to replace them until they wore out. I needed food to keep me alive and to nourish my body. I didn't need to buy expensive food, my mum taught me how to cook the basics. And so it went on, I was categorizing everything that came into my life, putting things into boxes, do I need it or want it?
I have noticed from reading forums and suchlike that everyone's needs and wants are different. All well and good if you have the money to pay for it all. But if you have to make your money last from one pay check to the next, then it would be beneficial to constantly review your needs and wants list, because it changes over time.
Some of my needs and wants are still the same, I still need a car because I value the freedom it gives me. So, for peace of mind I prefer not to drive an old banger which might break down. My car is now changed every so often and I save up for it. I still don't need a fancy house, new clothes and expensive food, so I decorate my house with second hand, and shop in charity shops and bargain hunt my food.
I definitely have everything I need, and I seem to have pretty much what I want, or do I? Well, it's nice to have dreams isn't it. We can all aspire to a better lifestyle, to bigger treats, and a few luxuries. But what if we don't have the money to pay for it? This is where the needs and the wants come into play, not losing track and getting carried away by all the nice things around us which we see and want.
For instance, I would like a campervan, wouldn't that be great, take off anywhere with my bed just behind the seat. The adventures I could have, wouldn't it be marvelous. But hang on a minute, have you seen how much they cost? Mega amounts of money which I haven't got. Spose I could save up for it, but it's going to take a long time. Spose I could sell my house and buy one, have thought about it, but what happens next. Time is getting on and I don't want to spend the rest of my life in a campervan, and once I have sold my house I will never get on the housing ladder again, it will have to be renting, and have you seen how much rents are these days? I did live in a small caravan for about a year and it wasn't very nice in the winter. No, my campervan will have to stay in the wants for now, and may never be bought.
So, it is the end of the year, the point of this post is to encourage you to sort out your needs and wants for 2017. Make a list, you will find over time that your priorities will change. If you have money to spare each month you might find that you can afford some of those wants, but if money is tight, you might only be able to buy the needs. If you are always skint you should look at your lists and move things around. The wants will have to stay where they are for the time being until your financial position improves. If there are needs which you can't afford they will have to be parked in the wants for the time being.
If you are living beyond your means you need to stop buying wants, you can't afford them, unless you do something to increase your income, take on extra work or change your job. Of course if you can write a book like Helen Gurley Brown, then you will be quids in.
That's it folks, the end of the year. 2016 has been pretty good for me, I have no regrets. Let's all try and make 2017 the year we take control of our lives. Tomorrow we start afresh, what's gone is gone. We start walking, we start looking after our bodies, we start prioritizing, we start enjoying the rest of our lives. This isn't a rehearsal, this is it.
Hello. Have you got over it yet? I think what this Christmas has shown is that I am an oddball in my family, I am different, not the same as them. I live my life differently to them. The real meaning of Christmas is long gone, and now it's only available from a supermarket.
Most people are not interested in saving the planet, of reducing their waste, and thinking about what will be left for future generations. The destruction of the earth is tragic, it's unfolding every day of our lives, right in front of us, and people can't see it.
My eating and drinking habits are moderate, everything in moderation. I don't like crowds and loud noise, I like space around me, and interesting conversations with people I can hear. Any noisy place is very unpleasant for me, all I can think about is escaping. I can stand it for so long then something snaps, I have to go.
My family was kind enough to invite me. I had long forgotten what a family Christmas was like, now I am reminded that it is noisy, so I shall go back to staying at home. I like my home, it's peaceful.
I listened to the whole three hours of the gentle music I posted yesterday, it's lovely and soothing. Here I am listening to it again. I think I shall be having more of this type of music on in the background in future.
I've been watching some Rick Parfitt videos, wasn't he a genius guitarist ? Been reading about George Michael. Such tragedies that they have gone too soon. If only they hadn't done the drink and drugs. If only.
I'll get off now. This week is in no mans land, one big day gone and another in a few days. I like New Year better than Christmas. Love a new start, a brand spanking fresh new year with lots to look forward to.
Thanks for popping in, we'll catch up soon. Toodle pip
PS. This post has been edited by the Administrator at 23.40 on 28th December.
Hello. I'm a bit stuck for ideas tonight, so I thought I would have a go with this questions and answers thingy nicked from the Guardian. If you want to read Suzi Quatro's answers click here. Lovely Grey did it the other day, thanks for the idea. If you want to read LG's answers click here.
When were you happiest? Lying in my bunk under my duvet in a truck, listening to the rain hammering down on the roof.
What is your greatest fear?
A traumatic death. I just want to fall asleep.
What is your earliest memory?
Peeing my pants on the way home from school.
Which living person do you most admire, and why?
Susan Boyle. She knew she had a talent for singing and never gave up. She followed her dream.
What was your most embarrassing moment?
I pulled out of a Lucas Factory in Birminghamwith a trailer full of machinery. I had only just got out of the gate when a large machine fell off and covered the road in oil. Everyone came to see what caused the loud bang. The fire brigade had to come and mop the oil up.
Property aside, what’s the most expensive thing you’ve bought? A car.
What makes you unhappy?
The way the world is going. Too many power crazy people. Cruelty to animals makes me very unhappy.
Who would play you in the film of your life?
Bette Midler
What is your most unappealing habit?
Talking over people before they have finished their sentence. I want to move on quickly and they are rambling all around the houses.
What is your guiltiest pleasure?
I never feel guilty. Life is a pleasure.
What is top of your bucket list?
I don’t have a bucket list. I make the best of each day as it comes.
What did you want to be when you were growing up?
A bricklayer, then a fashion model.
What is the worst thing anyone’s said to you?
My brother said, you look bloody awful, why don’t you get some contact lenses. He was right, and I did. It hurt at the time but it turned out to be the best thing anyone said.
What do you owe your parents?
I owe my mother everything because she gave birth to me. I suppose my father had a part in that too.
What does love feel like?
Sort of mushy.
What was the best kiss of your life?
Impossible to answer, can’t pinpoint one. There’s been some pretty hot ones over the years.
Who would you invite to your dream dinner party?
Noel Fitzpatrick, the Supervet.
Which words or phrases do you most overuse?
Can’t be bothered.
What has been your biggest disappointment?
That I was never pretty.
If you could go back in time, where would you go?
1968. I left home and got a bedsit in Blackpool.
How often do you have sex?
I'm celibate, can't be bothered, been there, done that.
When did you last cry, and why?
A few days ago, missing Rocky.
What do you consider your greatest achievement?
Sticking with lorry driving for 32 years, despite all the bullying.
What song would you like played at your funeral?
Down Down Status Quo. As loud as possible.
What is the most important lesson life has taught you?
Nothing stays the same. Every day is a brand new start, you can’t change what happened yesterday so move on.
Thanks to everyone who has shared their money saving tips for Christmas. I knew you wouldn't let me down. You're chuffin brilliant.
Thanks for popping in, we'll catch up soon.
Toodle pip
PS this is copy and pasted, I hope it works. Please excuse the higgledypiggledy margins. I ain't changing it.
Hello. As we are on the last straight towards the end of the Walk 1000 miles in one year challenge, I thought I would give you a condensed update taken from the original list. Click on the link above for the monthly scores. Thank you for updating and sharing your progress. From the original 64 who signed up, 43 are still on the list. I have deleted those who never really got off the ground. I don't like to give up on people too soon, but as I hadn't heard anything from them it added extra time for me to scroll through when updating. I suspect a few more have given up as I haven't heard anything from them since February. Or maybe they are still doing the challenge but just haven't told me.
Anyway, in no particular order, this is the state of play today. We have some who have already passed the 1000 mark, a fantastic effort, well done, you should be proud of yourselves. You can carry on to the end of the year if you like, to give you a grand total for the twelve months, or stop now, it's up to you.
Ilona 890 Ellen Anderson 669 Lisa in Miami 886 Mrs LH 255 Frugal in the Valley 260 Vampire Heart 1153 Hilogene Oltman 567 Simplesista 876 Julie 691 Juhli 135 Janice C 1008 Laura Blackpool 1002 1111 Sue G 606 Hilde 943 Gillie 872 Cherie 827 Helen D 948 km Shesewsyouknow 347 Jill 1018 Patricia 345 Jules 859 Sally C 808 Sonja 300 Pam 396 VickiEy 957 Amy in Florida 1777 walk/jog/cycl Hazel 916 Annie 178 Tigerlove 159 Clynnestra 97 Momsav 781 Wanda 113 Lizzie L 247 walk/cycl Laegalegle 217 Beachcomber 858 Solo Walker 285 Tracy 129 London Livin 271 Ann Ewart 93 Christine Neumann 692 Scarlett 995 Kay Schmitz 354 Wendy 756 Susan q 577
Some of you are so close, you will definitely finish it, possibly during November, but definitely by the end of the year. Don't worry if you are a bit behind, all kinds of things crop up which can knock you back a bit. The fact that you made a start and did your best is all credit to you.
Any challenge you take on will have it's ups and downs, the fact that this started on January the 1st made it more like a New Years Resolution. A burst of enthusiasm and you're all fired up to give it a go. It's just the same as giving up smoking, or trying to lose weight, or spend less, or save for an expensive item like a holiday or wedding.
Everybody has the idea of creating a new start in January, when in fact you can make a start at any time during the year. Telling yourself that you will do such and such, or give up or cut down is the easy part, it's keeping up the momentum that is hard. I have paced myself with this walking challenge, I'm a steady plodder and prefer to chip away at things rather than go hell for leather then experience burn out. Far better to lose a couple of pounds a month over a period of a year, rather than starve yourself for two months, then binge and put all the weight all back on again.
The key to any challenge is how long can you sustain it for. Looking at the long term to achieve the result you want can be daunting, it means you can often lose sight of your goal. Keeping that in your mind and focusing on the new you is imperative. Take your eye off the game and you can slip back down the slope. If this happens, pick yourself up and vow to do better.
A couple of people have asked, what next? It's looking like a new challenge is needed when this one has finished. I am hoping that some of you will be carrying on with your walking for health. I will always find an excuse to get out and walk. I will keep track of my miles by writing it on my calendar, maybe you could do the same.
I have things to do. Thanks for popping in. We'll catch up soon. Toodle pip
Hello. I saw this sign in a shop window in Lincoln a few weeks ago, and immediately thought, yep, that's right, definitely agree with it. Life is about creating yourself.
If you are lost then you took a wrong turn and you have to go back and look at things from a different angle, maybe find a better way. If you are not sure where your destination lies you could find yourself lost in a dead end, and unable to work out how you got there. Drifting along with no particular aims and ambitions and you are almost guaranteed to get lost somewhere along the way. And then what do you do? You start to question what is going to happen to you for the rest of the time you have left on this earth. You start soul searching, you begin to think, this isn't the real me, I don't know what the real me is. You ask how do I find myself? By then it could be too late, you are well and truly lost. However, if you make up your mind that you are going to make the best of your life, the very best that you can, that's a good start to building the foundations for the life you want. We can create a timetable, create our own unique journey, create opportunities, create our own little space where we feel comfortable, and create our friends. Far better to create your own life, before someone else does it for you. Thanks for popping in. Have a good weekend. Toodle pip
Hello and Good Morning. The weather has turned chilly and I am wrapping up more. The heating will not go on just yet, probably another month or two before it gets really cold. We are heading towards the end of the month again, they fly by, don't they. Only three more months left to the end of the year. How's your walking going? I am on 779 at the moment, had a boost this month with the Yorkshire trip and Ranger Ramble. I have passed the September target of 749, now heading for the October target of 832. Put your best foot forward and lets all have one last surge, let's do our best.
Need a quick topic for today's post, so I'll answer an email here, thank you L for sending this, it has given me an idea.
I think my life from the outside is too boring, I love your blog and like reading about other people.
I meet up with the same people every year, a Belgium couple,loads of French etc. all who escape their cold countries to wait it out where I live. We walk our dogs,talk, swim,eat, drink. But nothing to write home about. In the mean time I'll follow you.
Doesn't it cost to blog? How do you do it?
Hi L. Your first sentence makes me want to shake you. Your life from the outside is too boring? Nothing to write home about? C'm on, surely it's not that bad. Every day activities can be made very exciting, with a few ideas thrown in. The activities you list sound pretty much OK, dog walking is fabulous, the joy that dogs give is far better than anything else. Talking to people is great, I do it all the time, sometimes for too long. I witter on a bit, but I always feel great after a brilliant conversation with like minded folks. I enjoy talking to strangers, people have fascinating lives when you ask questions.
I like eating nice food, and the food I make myself is the best. Mixing and matching different ingredients, trying new ideas, making up recipes, is never boring. Stuff the conventional, invent your own new recipes. I don't drink much alcohol, I keep it as a treat. If I supped the stuff until I was sozzled, it would probably be very boring, and expensive. Again, mix and match, preferably non alcoholic low sugar drinks made with fresh fruit.
Swimming I can't do, and I have no desire to, it does not appeal to me one bit. If you like swimming think of ways to spice it up a bit. Set targets, pool parties, design and make your own costume, fancy dress swimming. Outdoor activities I love and I never get bored with going for a walk, and looking around places.
L, do not accept that what you have is all you are ever going to have. Same every year? Well change it, do something different, and then you will have something to write home about. If you keep yourself busy with new ideas, you won't have to follow me, you will have a life of your own. The rest of the post is for everyone, read it if you like, I hope it helps.
I don't very often tell my readers what they should be doing, but today I will make an exception. My life is my life, not your life, you have your own life. You must decide what you want to do with it, you must make up your own life, not copy mine. You are not me and I am not you.
Anybody that feels they have a humdrum life........
'I want you to open your eyes in the morning and say to yourself, 'That's great, I have been given another day, I'll take a few minutes to decide what I want to do with it. In 24 hours I will wake up to another new day, so I don't want to look back and think, that was a waste, I did nothing.'
Ok, so if you are struggling a bit, things not going right, you will think that this is a load of tosh and will never work. That's up to you, but at least give it a try. We are approaching winter, a time when Seasonally Affected Disorder can sometimes creep up on us. Now is the time when we can takes steps to fight it. Our bodies need daylight, so go outside every day. Look for things to do outside, even for an hour or two.
I know it's hard to get motivated sometime, I've been there, never suffered depression but have been very fed up at times. What I've learnt is that things never seem so bad after a nights sleep. Every morning I wake up refreshed and looking forward to a brand new day. My trick? I willed myself to become content with my life, and the older I get, the more content I become. I have brainwashed myself to be happy. If I am bored, I change things. No matter what is going on around me, what other people are doing, I am not them and they are not me.
I get emails from people saying they wish their life was more like mine. Well all I can say to that is buzz off and go and get your own life. Sorry if that offends but that is how I see it. I write this blog because it's about how I live my brilliant life on a pension. I am happy that you come along and share the journey, I like company. What I don't want anyone to do is stay on the bus and forget to get off. There are plenty of stops along the way, hop off the bus and do your own thing.
This quick topic has turned into a saga, so I'll get off and do something else. Before I go, I'll answer the questions, Doesn't it cost to blog, and how do I do it?
All it costs me is £4 a year which I pay to goooglie to upload loads of photo's. There is a ceiling on how many you can post and I reached that after about three years. So now I pay them a piddling amount to carry on. The other cost is time, loads of it, but as I am in control of my time, I can allocate as much or as little as I like.
How do I do it? Not sure if you mean how do you get started with blogging, or how do I keep it up for so long. To get started you click the 'B' icon, top left hand corner, and it takes you to the home page, and follow instructions. Blogging encourages me to write, and writing is creative. it satisfies some of my creative juices. If you want to become proficient at anything it's best to do it as often as time allows. If I didn't do anything all day I would have little to write about, so it encourages me to find things to do, to keep busy with what interests me. If you don't feed your brain you get nothing back, same as if you don't exercise and eat rubbish food, your body will deteriorate.
Right, really must go, brain down time, want to do something practical. Thanks for popping in, now go away and do something new, and come back later or tomorrow to tell me what you have done.
Hello. I'm trying to keep myself occupied when inside I want to weep buckets. Anyone who has lost a pet will know all about it, and judging by all your comments, most of you do know what it's like. The poor little chap couldn't go on any longer, his arthritis got worse, the fatty lump in his tummy got bigger, he was going off his food, he became deaf, and was getting very confused. He woke me at 4.30am on Sunday morning in a distressed state, trying to bury himself under my duvet. I knew then he was telling me something. As I had to go out on Monday I felt it was unfair to keep him hanging on until Tuesday. A lady vet and her assistant came at 12.45 and I held him supporting his head and he fell asleep in a second or two. He knew I was there with him. He now lies in the garden.
I have skimmed through all your comments, to read them brings on more tears. I will have to go back to them later when it is not so painful. Thank you all very much. One day I will tell more of Rocky's story, but for now I need to try and get on with keeping busy.
Yesterday me and Janet set up our stall at Epworth Show, to raise money for the rescue cats. It was very busy and our sales went very well, we were please with the amount taken. I sold all the shopping bags, and chatting to the customers was a welcome distraction to take my mind off things. At the end of the day I dropped Janet off and I didn't want to go home, but I knew the cats would be pleased to see me.
I took a few photo's at the show, I love the shire horses.
Vintage tractors.
I used to drive a small truck like this Bedford, loaded with doors and window frames on the back.
A good show of vintage cars.
Do you know, I never got to drive a Renault Magnum, it was the tallest cab in Europe when they first came out. .
Two young ladies performed acrobats on the back of their horses while they walked around the show ring. Everyone was eager to meet them and pet the horses.
This chappie was telling the audience all about his sheep. The sheep were busy eating the whole time.
Boy was it hot in the produce tent, like a sauna, couldn't stand it in there for very long.
I've been pottering around the house this morning, doing all the little jobs that usually get left. Anything to fill the time. This afternoon I went to pay the vet bill, and I went to Great Outdoors to buy some new walking boots. My feet have got used to walking in soft trainers and feel like they have spread out a bit, so I need a boot with a wider fitting. Found some, now I need to wear them around the house a bit, then do some shorter walks of around four hours and build it up to longer walks.
Going out for a walk now, almost the end of the month and I am on target reach 666 miles. How are you all doing with your walking? It is helping to calm my emotions. I did a second walk on Sunday night quite late because I wanted to tire myself out before I went to bed. It worked.
Thank you for popping in. We'll catch up soon. Lots of love xxx
Hello. Have I ever told you how much I hate the term, 'settle down?' I have just read this article about an Australian woman who took her young son out of school to take him travelling the world. She wanted to spend more time with him and self educate him. Somewhere in the comments someone asks how he will be able to settle down as an adult. Well, I was spitting feathers.
Where are the rules about settling down, does it happen when you reach a certain age? Is it something that is inevitable, the normal pathway from childhood, teenage years, and finally adulthood? I don't think so. The term 'settling down' says to me, stifling creativity. It says following the flock towards a life of humdrum existence. Ok if you choose to settle down as an individual later on and you are happy with that, but I love it when someone comes out and breaks the mould to follow their dreams.
Individuality is a kind of roller coaster ride. It's not safe, it's not steady, and it's not boring. I love going with my gut instinct, as this mother has done with her son. She has broken away from convention to do what she thinks is the best for the two of them. Her son looks happy, they are having the adventure of a lifetime, surely that has to be better than her being trapped in a stressful job, and him sitting for hours at a school desk trying to cram enough facts into his head to pass exams.
There are no rules for education, there is no starting date, and no finishing date. It begins the moment you are born, and ends upon death. Conventional education chiefs may think they know best, but sitting in a classroom does not work for everyone.
Have a look at their blog, actually it is a very good read, and see for yourself if this lad is missing out on anything. Who knows where his career path will take him. The world is full of possibilities, and he is out there grasping every exciting minute of it.
Thank you for popping in, I'll get on with some jobs now. We'll catch up soon. Toodle pip
Hello. The emails are piling up, I will get round to replying sooner or later, be patient. One blog reader has put in a request so I will endeavour to answer her questions. A bit from her email..... I wonder whether you would be good enough to do a blog post on how you stay so positive and happy? I'm nearing sixty and retired, life is getting a bit lonely. Don't get me wrong, I'm mobile, go out regularly and have lots of interests but my spirits are deteriorating. I just wondered, living alone as you do, how you keep so mentally cheerful and indeed, what cheers you in Life in general. I hope that makes sense?
It's always fascinating to learn how other people deal with living alone and I'm sure other people reading your blog would benefit from your thoughts. Unfortunately where I live there's a lot of emphasis on keeping children, young people and families entertained, but there's nothing for the older single person except Whist, Bowls etc and I'd rather die than do things like that. I think that's why so many people are old before their time - because they don't take any risks but fall into the 'old person' trap. It would be interesting to hear how you cope as I'm sure you must also get lonely sometimes?
Phew, where to begin. I think I have covered some aspects of this topic before but I can't find it anywhere.
Living alone. I have had a lot of practice at it, if you do something long enough you get used to it. It would feel pretty strange to me if there was someone else here. Some people are family orientated and love being part of a large family, I am not one of those. I suppose that's the independent streak in me, I think I was born with it. I always wanted to earn my own money and pay my way in life. I wanted to retain my individuality and not become half of somebody else. It's horses for courses, some people function better as a couple, I do not.
Do I get lonely sometimes? Hardly ever is the answer. I can take myself off in my head to a different place. I don't actually need people around me to be happy, I am happy with my own company. Admitted, I do wonder sometimes if anyone cares about me, but I can't control how anyone else thinks, I can only control my own thoughts. For instance, I visit family in the Midlands, but apart from my sister, (she rings me), I rarely hear from any of them from one year to the next. I'm a bit disappointed that I make the effort and they don't, but then I remember that they are young, have busy lives, and have family of their own. I will probably end up being the aged aunt and cousin that no one can be bothered with. I am not bitter about that because that's how life is. I made my choices a long time ago, the position I find myself in is down to me, no one else.
I have built a friendship base around me here, I know I can walk out of the door and there will always be someone to talk to. Saying that, if a person is so inclined you can be lonely in the busiest of cities. Low self esteem, shyness, lack of ideas on how to entertain yourself will lead to withdrawing indoors and not mixing with people. A suitable plan would be to work out what exactly you want to do. Really, for a single person the world is your oyster, the only hurdle you have to get over is to convince yourself to get on with it.
You need to know why your spirits are deteriorating. Is it because you have run out of ideas? You ask how I keep so mentally cheerful, and what cheers me about life in general. I have said this before, I live with an attitude of gratitude. I am so very grateful that I have everything I need. I am so pleased that I was born in the UK, pleased that my parents were hard working and my mum taught me how to manage on not much money. So pleased that I found a job at 15 and worked for the next 45 years. I am so very happy that I have reasonably good health, and hope very much that it continues.
I am an optimistic person, never worry about bad things that might happen because they probably never will. I take one day at a time and don't look too far ahead into the future. I wake up each morning and take a few minutes to be grateful that I am still breathing, and think about the wonderful day I might have. What have I got to worry about? Absolutely nothing.
How do I keep so mentally cheerful? I have a filter in my brain that blocks all the crap. I can't remember when I last had a negative thought. We don't have to take any old stuff that is thrown at us. We have the ability to make our own choices, we can decide where we want to be, and my choice is to be happy.
It goes without saying that a fit body, getting lots of exercise, is also the key to a healthy mind. It has been proven over and over again. Look at the difference between those who slump in front of the telly every night, eating takeaways and rubbish food, to someone who goes running, walking, cycling, and goes to the gym. Look at the amount of empty cans and wine bottles in the recycling boxes. All these poor life choices will affect how the brain works. This is not me lecturing, anyone can do exactly as they like, but I personally try and look after myself. We only get one body, once it's knackered that's it. Now someone is going to point out that even slim healthy people can have heart attacks. There you go, I've said it for you so you don't have to bother putting that in a comment.
I think I'm going to wind this up now, I've been rambling on long enough. Before I go though, I will say this. I know nothing about depression and mental health problems. If anyone thinks they are really struggling the best thing to do would be to seek help and support from a professionally qualified person. I am not that person.
